Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Oh, hai.

It's been. . .a month? Six weeks? Seven weeks?

God, who knows. All I know these days is getting up in the dark, working under artificial lights, going home in the dark, and praying for the sweet, sweet release of death.

Not really. But close.

In the time since I last caught up with you guys, I have survived The Annual Music Festival That Makes My Commute Home Even More Unpleasant, three more checkups with various CANSUH doctors (all clear!), and a staffing reduction.

Because when you win awards and have fantastic patient outcomes and get featured in advertising campaigns, with pictures and everything, that's how you're rewarded: with staffing cuts.

And it's rained a couple of times, which is kind of a big deal, because our county usually breaks up and dissipates large thunderstorms. I think it's a function of having so much hot air here every couple of years, when the Legislature is in session.

But anyway, yeah: Manglement decided that we were just too damned efficient and fantastic, and so cut our staffing by a third. One of our nurses is out taking care of an aging/sick/dying parent, so that meant that I worked, like, all the time. I barely had time to eat something that wasn't fast food, let alone write.

It's frustrating to be managed by a person who has no critical-care experience. It's equally frustrating to be managed by somebody who hasn't laid paws on a patient in, oh, at least fifteen years--and it's worst of all when those two people are combined into one. I feel sort of like a character from "Savage Chickens"--there's this robot with a board with a nail sticking out of it who comes around whenever somebody Important is about to tour the facility, but otherwise never shows up.

So we're all trying to focus on the positive. Two of our nurses recently had babies, which is always nice if you like babies, and I am, so far, not going to have to have more surgery to chop malignancies out of my head. Boyfiend's foot-drop has completely resolved. The cats and dog are making a habit of cuddling together, a la A Peaceable Kingdom. Nobody's tried to punch me lately. (Well, they tried, but they didn't connect. Much.)

I have a couple good stories to tell. I also have some eyebrows to pluck. You can tell, by looking at my eyebrow game, which takes priority today. Tonight, I will be dining on white wine and scrambled eggs and biscuits with sausage gravy, oh fuck yeah.


Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear about the staffing reduction. I am a new BSN grad, and I am finding that it is almost impossible to land a job in my area (Austin).

bobbie said...

You've been missed in blogland...

YAY on the all clear check-ups!!

BOO on the staff reductions!! Those folk are SOOOO idiotic! Next you'll get reprimanded for not getting those fantastic pt. outcomes...

Does your place have mandatory overtime???

Sending you strength & courage ~

Comradde PhysioProffe said...

Cattes and dogges are cuddling == shitte's about to get real!

messymimi said...

Enjoy the gravy, and i've missed you. Glad the hitting patient mostly missed, too, although my missing reading your blog is the nice kind.

Jess said...

Add me to the chorus of "I've missed you!"s. It's great to hear from you.

Boo and hiss, manglement. I really wish it was a requirement that all nurse managers spend regular time doing patient care as a regular nurse on the unit.

cowango said...

Make that yet another person who has missed you. I've disparaged you were lost in the wilds of Texas. So sorry to hearing of the staffing. We in KY are not doing much better, working on a shoestring. Thank heaven my manager has experience recently and mostly seems to understand. Hoping for better days ahead for you.

Dana said...

So true. I have had two managers now with no critical care experience, even though I have worked in OR/endoscopy procedure units. Why doesn't the hospital care? I mean, it's great to have a manager who can spout off some random policy about conscious sedation, but what I really want is a person who knows what to do/what you need when shit is going down.