Thursday, July 14, 2011

My pussy smells like fish.

Which wouldn't be a problem, except the fish (she says, with emphasis, giving Notamus the side-eye) was meant for my dinner.

This afternoon I told Der Alter Jo the charming story of how Notamus had once intercepted a piece of pepperoni, mushroom, and black olive pizza while it was on its way to my mouth. He got a healthy shark-bite out of it before he bounced off the wall.

What? You try eating pizza when something with teeth is going after it and see what you do.

So, tonight, I had made myself a lovely tuna salad with chopped cornichons and shredded cucumber and grated onion and a delicate lashing of mayo. I had planned on eating it with pita bits and maybe itty shreds of veggies.

I mixed up the tuna with the mayo (home-made, by the by, with lemons I squeezed myself and olive oil carefully dribbled into the blender) and the onion and the cornichons and then turned my back to assemble the other bits of dinner.

When I turned around, I found one Notamus eating MY TUNA.

*cue frustrated troll noises*

So: Notty got two-point-six ounces of tuna. With fixin's. I got pistachios and wine.

HAT is only one letter different from CAT.

(And, post-scriptally and parenthetically, how weird is it that my cat likes sour French pickles? Because the underlying aroma of his breath is cornichons, overlaid with TUNA. Bastard.)

11 comments:

Penny said...

Little BASTARD.

messymimi said...

Several years ago, Takanumi (now with his Maker) got to the perfectly grilled steak, so i sympathize. We ate beans.

Silliyak said...

Well, THAT'S going to get some hits off Google

Just My 2¢ said...

Jo,
You must be feeling better. It takes somebody full of vinegar to dare the trolls like that. Let the games begin!

bdaiss said...

Haha! I had the same thought as Silliyak!

Damn cats. They pick the worst possible times...many times mine have been threatened with the hat fate. They've now learned to stay off the kitchen surfaces or they will get a shot from "the hose" (the one attached to the sink). They get plenty of "treats" what with a 4 year old and 1 year old in the house. They better stay out of my cooking way.

jimbo26 said...

(g) in the UK that header is entirely different , I'll leave it to your imagination . ( With utmost respect ) .

Cr0w$C@llilng said...

I had a cat who enjoyed olives, but not the pimento.

He would beg and beg for an olive. Nom it, and leave the pimento, intact, without blemish, on the floor.

nosokomaniac said...

Saw the title of this post in my g-reader and completely thought it was spam. Died laughing when I realized it wasn't.

How did you keep him away when you opened the can? My sphynx goes apeshit when I open *any* can, even if it's just some San Marzano's...

Solitary Diner said...

Cats are crazy creatures.

Becca said...

Oooh the little bugger.

I'm mostly PEG fed these days but I do enjoy the occasional rice pudding (with loadsa jam in). I have 3 cats. Cats really like rice pudding. And they're stronger than me...

salegamine said...

I hope the cat is OK. I am told onion is bad for kitties.

Mine likes curry for crying out loud. Oh and burrito filling.