Monday, August 11, 2008

If dogs wrote personal ads

MATURE, DIGNIFIED male seeks calm and loving partner for long walks on the beach, quiet evenings at home, and belly rubs. I am h/w proportionate, have a full head of reddish-brown hair (no grey yet!) and keep my nails carefully trimmed. I enjoy soft music, good food, relaxing times together, and the occasional snack. Write MAX, box XXXX.

**** **** **** **** **** ****

ATHLETIC BLOND seeks energetic friend for adventures! Interests include property destruction, digging in the dirt, scratching my own back, tearing up shit, property destruction, barking, running around in circles, shedding, property destruction, and (if I'm given the chance) desecration of the world's most sacred archaelogical sites. Call me! Come on! Come on! C'monc'omonc'mon! Let's go run around together!!! BOOF!! to STRIDER, box XXXX.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hilarious....made me LOL for real! Thanks for the day brightener.

Phorun Medipoxy said...

Thanks for the laugh! :-D

Heidi said...

And if The Cat wrote one?

woolywoman said...

Damn, I think your dog and my dog are cousins....he's here in his crate by the bed just this minute, destroying toys than guarantee indestructibility and generally acting like a fool.

GingerJar said...

Haaaaaahaaaaaaaa...I love your sense of humor. I have three dogs...their ad's would be

Abby: Short/good looking redhead in search of companion. Non-smoker, drinker ok, must like short walks on the beach, and swimming in the surf. Respondants wanting off-spring need not apply.

Izzy: Small, Sleek and active. Likes to bark at everything and howl at the moon. If you like excitment, I'm your game.

Killer: Seeking female canine species. Must be able to provide filling and satisfying meals 16 times daily. Enjoy long naps, short walks, and running into walls. (Mature respondants only)

*grin*