Tuesday, June 16, 2009

It's official.

I have seen people who have had various body parts kicked in or off by various animals.

I have seen people who have been hit by drunk drivers, popped ill-advised wheelies on overpowered motorcycles, been hit by lightning, and fallen off structures of varying heights.

I have seen people who have grabbed the end of a downed power line, been run over by a truck on ice, been hit in the head with a keg of beer (full), been hit in the face with a trailer hitch at 70 mph, and who have failed utterly at trying to kill themselves.

I had never before seen somebody who's been scalped by a mixer.

Therefore, I have this to say: I believe that I have now seen it all. 

And this, come to think of it: Those plastic guards on five-foot-tall commercial mixers are there for a reason. Do not remove the guard, then lean over into the mixer to see how things are going in there, with the 300 rpm whatsis going round and round. Okay? Okay.

I wish the guy who stuck his head under the running combine to see what was making that funny noise were still around. We could double-room those two.

8 comments:

  1. Yet another reason why I don't cook.

    Hallie :)

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  2. Common sense fail.
    Poor guy though :S

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  3. Great googley moogley.

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  4. Indian name....Danger Baker.

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  5. These sound like candidates for the Darwin awards.

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  6. Good Lord, some people are so dumb, heh!

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  7. Anonymous12:03 PM

    And as the police officer in a town near you said, "You can't fix stupid."

    Mom

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  8. I saw a young woman partially scalped when her long, swingy, blond hair got caught in a Dairy Queen ice cream do-hickey machine. This was way back in the 70's. More recently, in the 1990's I had a little old guy come wandering into our ER. holding his right hand, which was a charred, black claw. He had gotten it stuck in his corn auger machine. No one else was around so he drove himself 40 miles to the hospital. I am now retired but those kinds of human v/s machines stick out in my memories. I worked in a very small rual hospital in Wyoming and sometimes we nurses kept everything afloat until we could get a doc to come in. There was no such thing as an ER doc and no doctors were around at night. We would sometimes run through the ACLS algorithm twice before a doctor was there to take over (more likely pronounce). I don't think the public knows how much nurses are the bedrock of hospital care. Yet do you think we could ever get a nurse on the hospital board? Nope.

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