Some time ago, right after I moved in here, I bought some great midcentury modern wallpaper to put in the kitchen. The kitchen project was stalled until this week, when I had a few extra days off work.
So down came the horrible masonite on the walls. I taped and mudded and sanded and primed and put up the first wall's worth of paper.
The Kitchen said, "What the hell do you think you're doing?
I replied, "Putting up wallpaper. What does it look like I'm doing?"
The Kitchen snapped, "I hate that stuff. Take it down right the hell now."
ME: Buuuhhh...buuuhhh....I like this wallpaper!
KITCHEN: *I* don't. I'm not Midcentury Modern, you idiot; I'm Postwar Cute!
ME: Uh...there's a difference?
KITCHEN: Well, duuuuhhh. Yeah.
ME: So what's Postwar Cute?
KITCHEN: Take a look at me, Bozo! I've got glass-fronted cabinets and wide woodwork and high ceilings! Lots of cute cabinets! I need small-figured wallpaper with a chair rail and white paint, not this uber-modern faux Fifties crap!
ME: Um......
KITCHEN: Take. It. Down. Now. Or you'll never cook in this town again.
So I took it down. We eventually compromised: white walls with stencilled, multicolored polka dots in cascade, painted in Fiestaware colors.
Which means the kitchen won't be done before Wednesday, when my time off ends. Dammit.
You know, I used to be sure my mom was crazy when she told me that every room in the house told her what color to paint it. I'm not so sure now.
4 comments:
The kitchen is wise. Listen to the kitchen.
Yah, my kitchen refuses to be yellow. Talks have stalled, and I'v left Kitchen with her drywall hanging out for almost a year now. I should just ask, but I'm too stubborn.
My study says "Bright green? What made you think you'd want a bright green study?"
Hmmm. I notice it's about the color of the captcha letters here.
Hahahahahaha! You are the bomb...you know if the walls were talking it was probably:
"Back away from the paint-brush and nobody gets hurt!"
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