Saturday, December 18, 2004

Okay, okay, it's done.

Bidness

Whew. I got a number of new links up. My original idea was to parcel them all out nicely so that Gentle Readers would have some idea of what they were getting into (Medical? Humor? Other?), but not only do my HTML skills suck, I figured at the end of the day that I don't know what I'm getting into at any given moment; why should you?

Update the First

Coworker's Brother has had the last of four surgeries. The docs found the bleed that was giving him trouble, so he'll be medevac'ed to Europe in the next few days.

Update the Second

Troublesome Coworker is rapidly weaving rope.

Update the Third

Hemicorporectomy Guy (and don't feel bad if you've been humming "Eric the Half-A-Bee"; we all have) is doing fine.

End of Updates.

Any nurse can tell you that a number of folks will ask, when told that you're a nurse, how to improve their health, well-being, and general mood. In an attempt to head off those folks at Christmas parties this year, I present:

Nurse Jo's Tips On How To Live A Happy, Healthy Life

1. Don't be mean. That's number one for a reason. If you're mean, you make everyone around you miserable. You'll be lonely and sick and people will think you deserve it. So don't do it. Smile, smile, smile.

Or if you can't, at least fake it.

2. Shut your piehole and move. No great mystery here. The average person eats too much and moves too little. Get or borrow a dog and take it on runs. Play with your kids. Turn off the TV, or at least do crunches during the commercials.

3. Vegetables: the green things at one end of the grocery store. Vegetables are fun. Really. They're interesting. You should eat them occasionally.

4. Relax. There's nothing worth getting *that* upset over.

5. Drink if you like, smoke if you must. Just don't be a self-righteous twerp. See Point Number One. Self-righteous twerpiness goes right along with meanness in shortening your life. I don't care what you do as long as you're a reasonable human being. If your choices are smoke crack or be a twerp, let me get you a lighter.

6. Water. Your body is 70% water, not 70% Diet Coke.

7. Find what you like to do, then do it. This relates both to work and non-work situations. If you passion is basket-weaving, then by all means, weave baskets. The point is to have at least one thing in which you can lose yourself on a weekly if not daily basis. Which brings me to:

8. Get out of your own head. It ain't all about you, so find something that helps you remember that.

9. Act. Whatever gods are running the Universe don't care what you *think*, they care what you *do*.

10. Recognize that life really *is* that funny and ridiculous.

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